i would hug you (oh, yes, that's YOU - the one sat right there wondering why the hell you are reading this)... but you are too far away

i would kiss you... but you would probably run away, crying. hahaha.

i wish i could be sixteen forever, and see the world as fresh, and beautiful, and mysterious every day when i woke up. i had a grandad who seriously did wake up every morning and feel glad for every single day. he used to say 'god is good' all the time. and his wife had died of cancer in her twenties, his daughter had become blind with meningitis at the age of four, he worked in a factory all his life, frequently had heart attacks and only travelled away from blackburn (to blackpool) once in his life. he thought wales was a town near london. but he was the coolest guy.

i think tolkien really put his finger on it in the silmarillion - 'he gave men the strangest gift of all' - a constant yearning for something else that could never be found on earth. some people are always frustrated because they are always searching. some enjoy the beauty of the search and the unknown. some give up. some are happy with not knowing. who knows, some might even find it.

my dad took the tv away!! and the england/brazil match is tomorrow!! no! please, no! he always does this. he takes the tv into work when important england matches are on and makes his employees bacon sarnies. but i'm his flesh and blood! i missed 'ed'! oh, god... i have just realised how pathetic i truly am. but i love that show.

i found out that my religious studies teacher used to be in a well-known peace-punk band. how bizarre is that? they were on top of the pops, and made 3 albums - 'the lost cherrees'. i think she's quite embarrassed about it. heh heh. i always suspected there was something we didn't know about her - she once told my brother to make spliffs out of bible paper because it's so thin. hmmmmmm.
you can request their songs and others at www.totalpunkradio.com - go go go!

i spent all of today doing silly dances to reel big fish and me first and the gimme gimmes. i love that song #i'd like to thank the guy.../who wrote the so-ong.../that made my baby fall in love with me...# it makes me laugh my ass off every single time.
i desperately need more music. i'm like a hungry hungry... erm... music eater

this summer, i will do stuff. i promise. i will do stuff that no other bored teenager has ever done before. i might even kiss some babies.

'the difference between confusion and "don't know",
is that confusion sees only one way out and the way is blocked;
"don't know" is open to miracles and insights'

~steven levine~

someday, i will make my own quotes and stop recycling the words of others, but not yet. not yet. not yet. (see what i did there? that was out of 'gladiator'. hahaha. i'm so funny. i crack myself up. oh, i'm so great...)
*skips away*